Seems I feel like writing today… despite not having much to say.
I always intend for my blog to be this unfiltered place where I can go and write whatever I want without fear of anyone reading it. In many ways this creates a paradox for me. I need to know that nobody [I know] is reading it in order to say the sorts of things I often say, but at the same time, the fact that no one reads it makes it less interesting to keep up. I want people to read what I have to say and respond to it. When nobody reads, it becomes difficult to care about it.
And yet if lots of people were reading, it would change the way I write. I might think twice about spilling a particularly personal detail. I might hold back a viewpoint that some could find offensive. Anonymity is at once a safety blanket and an adversary. No one knows who you are, but no one cares either.
I guess you could say this is me making excuses; just me trying to justify why I haven’t written here in such a long time. I could pad this blog with all manner of posts about my varied interests in the same way that most bloggers do, but that was never the point. I didn’t create this blog to talk about my favorite band, my new hobby or the day-to-day hassles of life. I wanted this to be a place to put into words the feelings that have no other outlet.
It could simply be the case that I haven’t had many of those feelings lately. It could be that my life has finally reached a point where I am comfortable with who I am and the direction I’m taking.
Somehow, I doubt it.
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